With Cern finding the elusive Higgs Boson particle last year it has been widely reported that, theoretically, time travel may now be possible. Well I am here too tell you with the shuddering cliche that science fiction is now...science fact.
It was a couple of weeks ago when I took my 7 year old and his best mate out early on a friday evening for fish and chips. As we ate we talked, (sorry, they talked, I listened) they drank some cola, I had a half of beer, they drank some of that, they burped, we laughed. It was fun.
As we walked back to my house my boy, who had not been feeling too well, attempted to fart. It became immediately clear from his raised eyebrows and desperate clenching that he had been slightly overambitious in his attempt and the fart was slightly less 'ethereal' than he intended it to be. Lets just say there was more 'substance' than he was hoping for.
Anyway we got him home, cleaned him up, they had a play,and then it was time to drive his mate home. The 3 of us got in the car and being early friday the radio was pumping out 'club classics', so they turned it up to earsplitting volume and I drove while 2 small lunatics threw themselves a round the car.
So we get back to the friends house, jump out of the car and the boys Dad opens the front door and says 'Hi son. Have you had a good night?'
It was at this very point where time leapt forward approximately 11 years. I was no longer with two little 7 year olds but instead all I could see were 2 big hairy arsed 18year olds who had just got home from a big friday night out.... because they said exactly this......
My sons friend 'Yeah we had a great night, we went to the chippy and we drank beer and we have had loads of coke and then we have been dancing to some banging tooooooooooooones!'
At which point my son jumps in front of the door and with unconfined glee shouts 'Yeah....AND I SHIT MYSELF!'
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